Tag Archive: birthday

On the 12th moon

Otis looked up, dark eyes as round as saucers, at the full moon. A quick check on his fingers confirmed it. This was the 12thmoon. Knowing that it would only cause hunger pains he walked down the street to the corner bakery anyway. Smudging the oversized windows with his grimy fingers he was unable to stop imagining how the large fluffy bites might actually taste.

He didn’t remember why he had started to keep count, tracking the moons through the years, but Otis remembered when. The snow had been nearly waist deep as he walked through the night, and the biggest full moon he had ever seen had followed his struggle. Now when he saw the full moon he felt strong and 12 in a row meant… something even if he couldn’t quite explain what it was.

Having leaned even closer to the display window the bell above the bakery door made Otis jump as it rang out. The woman who stood in the door way looked terrifying as a backlit and shadowy figure. Otis considered bolting.

“Wait…” the woman said reading the instinct in his eyes. She held out a small box in one hand still holding the door open with the other.

Otis hesitated only momentarily, fearing the trap of easily grabbable things, before snatching it and running off.


Today I am…

Have you ever had that dream where no matter how fast you run you never move, either away from the impending doom or towards some desired thing?  Welcome to my life.  No matter how hard I try I cannot escape my looming dark shadow.  It finds me at inopportune moments forcing me to accept its truth.  I remember it suddenly, with a pounding heart, when I allow my mind to wonder.  It stalks me.  My own personal viper in the flower bed just waiting to strike.  But…more and more I feel the fight leaving me.  I run slower from the shadow, my denial rings hesitant in my ears, and I find myself waiting to be caught.  I cannot be sure that this is not me giving up, but perhaps, just perhaps, it could be something more.  Patience, acceptance, or my very own version of waiting till I see the whites of its eyes.

The moment is upon me and just like that the decision is made. 

I shall not run, for there is no more fear.  I will not be consumed, because it can be mastered.  I have not been burned, instead I will glory in this mark.  I refuse to hide, cover, or conceal this part of me, which I cannot escape, as it is not a stain against my person.  My intent is set.  It is mine, but I am not defined by it.  Today I am 30, and that is nothing more than the latest addition to the list that describes me.


As seen on ncglists.org

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